Showing posts with label Fiction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fiction. Show all posts

Sunday, January 28, 2018

Dreams, Wishes, Future...

       I love to dream. I love exploring my self-conscious and gaining insight into the mysteries I wasn't even aware were pulling on my conscious. Dreams are my mind's way of processing the world around me and even when they don't make sense, I embrace them...
        My dreams can be the beginning of a story I had no idea needed writing or could be just the thing I needed to get that scene just right. They spark that part of me that believes magic is real, aliens exist, and an open mind is the only way in which to live.
         Sometimes my only faith can be found in God and in dreams...
Take for instance Saturday (January 27, 2018, can you believe we are in 2018?) I was in bed completely exhausted. I'd been cooking for the week ahead, researching for my latest project, and writing all day... Not usually the combination for dream territory, but I gave in and shut down everything, and gave into the feeling. I fell alseep thinking about "Jenna".
She was the wallflower used to living her life in the shadows. She was used to life passing her by. Used to not trying, because it was easier than failing.
        She was the child of two people who never would have had her if they had not taken the risk to be together. Her parents had been Adventurers and she was caution incarnate. She was ready for more. Ready to jump off the cliff and find out whether she could fly. She was a story ready to be written and I wanted to be the person to write her.
        I wanted to be the person who got to know her and to be there when she found her purpose in the world. In my dreams, she's an outline. The promise of a story sure to get my synapsis firing,
        It was the same when I wrote Dessani Queen, Wintr's Homecoming, Witch's Reflection, or She Gets What She Wants. I just knew she was something worth exploring.
Dreams, stories, and books can be heartbreaking. They can be unfulfilled wishes. They can be the future yet to come. But boy-oh-boy can they be fun to read.
        "Jenna" is and was a story I knew I would create. She is the kinder Jinx. The more timid Makayla. At the beginning of her growing awareness feminity and her own strength as a woman, she is learning just how exciting life could be when making the "right" choice wasn't always the way to get to her objective. She was a heroine and I couldn't wait to see how her story shaped out.
        How crazy is it, that I can dream something and feel so certain that it was meant to be shared? That by placing pen to paper I am sharing a part of myself to the outside world. Quite literally, because if you have read about my writing style before you knew I write on pen and paper as well as typing. I like the tactile sensation of working through writer's block by putting orders down with ink and seeing how I still feel about that scene when I am actually typing up.
        As a child, writing was my release. It was how I dealt with my feeling and how I organized my thoughts. Now it is as paramount as breathing. It is how I create content girls and women like me wished they had when it seemed like the world was crashing in and they wanted to read about someone who knew about their experiences... Who shared features with them and knew that coconut oil was life. I write and for the most part, it is for me. It feeds that creative part of me, but it is also for my sisters, friends, aunts, and for the women who read the books traditionally offered by mainstream media and feel unfulfilled because they aren't pale skinned. They aren't natural blondes with beautiful blue eyes.
        Their hair is kinky. Their eyes are, for the most part, varying shades of brown. Their universe doesn't necessarily start or end with the ghetto and gansta life. They want to believe in the supernatural for a few hours during the day and to read about a heroine that looks like them finding love with a hero. They want that ever elusive happily ever after.
        You know the one... With the guy on horseback, preferably with no shirt, a pearly white smile, and bulging arm muscles. 
        I want the people who read my books to dream. About their wishes. About their future... I want them to read those books and know their futures are unbelievably bright. Happily ever after isn't just for our paler friends. It is for us. Our Princes aren't just disowned royals without a dime to their name and aspirations of being a musician.


Contact Info:

Website:

Facebook:
Durand Publishing
Wintr's Homecoming
Jaguar Nights

Instagram:
Jensawanderingthoughts


Friday, July 14, 2017

Dream Date



We pick something fun with lots of bombs
and a predictable ending.
You wear your favorite tee and a pair of old sweats.
I'm wearing my glasses and a dozen dots of zit cream.
My head is on your lap 
as your sock covered feet rest on the coffee table.
Your fingers play with the tips of my braids.
I'm trying to throw popcorn into your mouth.
You tease me, when I squeak during the tense scenes.
I tease you, when you drool over the cars.
We aren't trying to impress each other.
We are happy.
Carefree.
We are living the dream.

Monday, May 8, 2017

Monday, March 13, 2017

Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Where Do I See Myself In Five Years...


Someone asked me that question during a mock interview and it floored me a little. Not because I do not think about my future or what I want in that future. But because the way I think of it is not in the way a prospective employer or business partner. In the same way I do not think of success in terms of awards or accolades.
I do things, not in the hopes that they will be well received, but in the hopes I never regret not doing it. People say it is better to say sorry, than to ask for permission and be denied. Stepping into this world of adulthood it is becoming more and more apparent that nothing in life happens according to plan.
In some ways I guess I believe in fate. Not in the sense that people have no control over their future, but in the sense that there are things people have to go through. There is hurt people have to feel and lessons people have to learn.
I live a relatively tame life. I personally think that I am a boring person. Individually. My family as a whole has its moments. But me on a daily basis is the normal grind of a girl trying to carve out a life of success for herself. Maybe it's because I write female leads with such dramatic, comedic, and amazing sex lives that my life just pales in comparison?
I work, hang with friends or family, cook, write, respond to emails. Occusionaply on my off hours I do legal research for family members who believe I live off of prayers and plates of rice. (Though I shouldn't complain too much because they do feed me and prayers are always appreciated.) My present is full, crazy, stressful, busy, and happy for the most part. My future will hopefully be the same way.
When I think of the future it is not in set markers. I think about it in the sense of personal success. I approach work with the mindset that my hard work may not always be rewarded, but at least I know I did the best that I could.
In five years, I want to be stronger, wiser, and smarter than I am today. I want to be surrounded in a eco system of love. I want to own a house. Run a financially solid business. Excel in my professional field and be the kind of person I have always wanted to be.
I hope to be independent and happy in whatever position I am in because I know I have dreams and the tools to reach them. Now try saying all of that to a prospective employer and not feeling like you have talked to much. Hence why that is a question I am constantly searching for the canned answer for. The future a fluid thing with all sorts of ripples and waves. I have no clue where I will be or the people who will be beside me. But I do know in five or ten years I will be successful...
Because in my mind I am successful here and now. Just by being able to be myself, learn, change, mold my future, and reach for what I want without asking permission, but occasionally tossing apologies over my shoulder.

Completed Works
Secrets, Lies, & Betrayal Series:

The Virgins Club:

Lipstick Diaries:

Solo Romances:
Lasting Kind Of Love

True Match Arrangements:

The Young and The Powerful

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Circling Currents

I speak and sometimes it feels like the words just fade away.
No one hears.
No one listens.
I scream and it echos for only me.

You Nag.
Are Unforgiving.
You Live in the past.

Labels surround me.
Bombard me.
But they are just words.
So like mine I let them fade.
I don't listen.
My ears hear nothing.

Completed Works

Secrets, Lies, & Betrayal Series:

The Virgins Club:

Lipstick Diaries:

Solo Romances:

The Young and The Powerful

Monday, February 6, 2017

Livia Penton – Pearl Moon


      Pearl Moon is the exploration of how a couple recovers from betrayal. When the trust shared is broken, can it be repaired? Livia has had her life turned on its head. She is preparing to give birth to a child she did not want and was entirely sure she would not damage.
      Her best friends. Her sisters have entered into loving relationships as she stands in ruins of her own. Sei ji is the man she chose and he pulls away from anything permanent. The announcement of their impending parenthood sent him running for the door. It kept him gone for months. Now he is back wanting a second chance.
      Livia is faced with the possibility of having the man she loves by her side. The question she has to answer first is whether or not she wants him. Does she believe he has changed? Can she trust him to stay by her side? Will he stay by her side? All of these thoughts plague her because it is no longer just her.
      Livia has “the parasite” to worry about and care for.
      This character was so great to write. She expresses so many emotions. Because she has so many of them. Those pregnancy hormones are real. Deep down she is a romantic who wants what every women wants. Love and loyalty.

Here is an exclusive of Pearl Moon –Excerpt from Chapter 6

      Livia looked at Sei and rubbed her belly as her anxiety started to rise. Sei looked completely at ease. Nothing about him revealed any sort of tense.
      “Do you want to start first,” Livia asked.
      “How are you?”
      “I am fine.”
      “And the baby?”
      Livia tensed even more even as she tried to maintain her calm. Stress was a bad thing and her baby needed calm. It needed peace.
      “The baby is fine.”
      Sei nodded, “I want to start over.”
      Livia blinked. Then shook her head. She was a little thrown by the frankness of his announcement. Then again she shouldn’t have. Sei was not one to crouch things in ambiguous terms.
      “Sorry?”
      “I told you months ago. I want to start over. I want to build something with you. Something stronger then what we had before.”
      Livia shook her head. “No.”
      Sei leaned forward. “Why not?”
      “Because I cannot trust you,” Livia said as she shook her head, “You are not trustworthy.”
      “Livia.”
      She placed her arms onto her desk, “You ran. I told you, I was pregnant. You accused me of trying to trap you. Then jumped in one of your cars and left.”
      “I was blindsided.”
      Livia laughed sharply. “And I wasn’t? I had a person growing in me. I did not have months to get used to the idea of it happening. I had to deal with it then. Alone.”
      “I came back.”
      “And when you came back you looked like someone had put you through a meat grinder.”
      “Some things happened that were not under my control.”
      “Are you really trying to push the blame off of yourself?”
      “No,” Sei said as he looked into her eyes, “I just wanted to explain. I loss control of things for awhile but those factors are no longer present and I learned from the experience.”
      Livia studied him. His mussed hair, curved nose, and thick lips were all of the things that trapped her. He looked earnest. He sounded like he meant what he said. And Livia wanted to believe him. She wanted to believe in him.
*End of Excerpt

Completed Works

Secrets, Lies, & Betrayal Series:

The Virgins Club:

Lipstick Diaries:

Solo Romances:

The Young and The Powerful